How are you doing? Have you been feeling the pressure to be ‘lockdown perfect’? There’s tons of content out there encouraging us to use this time to be fitter, more perfect, happy, meditated out and eating exciting new recipes.
But it doesn’t really feel like that for most of us. Most of us are juggling, assimilating, trying to plod on….imperfectly. Maybe revealing our frailties is much more important…
Liz Abram (a Coach from our Member’s Club) has some brilliant, and typically straight talking, words about what the Japanese art of Kintsugi and the philosophy of Wabi-sabi can teach us about being truly human, now and always.
Here are Liz’s words:
The ancient Japanese developed the art of Kintsugi (golden joinery) which is the repair of broken or cracked pottery items with liquid gold. This has an unusual effect, as the very scars which had rendered the item ugly or useless become the most attractive thing about the reconditioned piece. The mended scar becomes the star!
The idea of Kintsugi seems to be closely related to another Japanese philosophy – Wabi-sabi – which celebrates the flaws and imperfections in something or someone.
So, what about our own glorious cracks? The stuff we never seem to improve on or get right, the bad habits or hapless lack of skill that trips us up time after time and makes us feel less than adequate?
The thing is, nobody would really like us if they thought we were perfect. We’d seem untouchable, unrelatable, unassailable and boring maybe. Deep down we realise that, in order to perpetuate the myth of perfection, we’d be constantly uptight in our efforts to project the mirage of our best selves, living our best life. And we all know that’s bollocks, don’t we? Because apparent perfection can cleverly conceal the fragile ego of someone who feels they are not worthy of appreciation of who they truly are. You know, that normal human being that looks like a sack of spuds as a default setting, farts like a skunk and licks the dinner plate when no one’s looking (no – just me then?)
There is so much more mileage as a human to revealing our frailties and imperfections. There is so much more to like about someone who skids in sideways with their arse on fire, bits falling off them left, right and centre – because they bring energy, honesty, fun and relatability. There is, in my opinion, far more grace and honesty in being yourself than trying to fool yourself or be something you simply are not.
I think the biggest thing of all is this; it is in working to repair ourselves or help others that we become resilient and also understand ourselves better through conversations and relationships. Rejoice in each others’ cracks! (as it very much were) because those cracks are where the light gets in and the love spills out. Our cracks, (when we choose to reveal them) shout out “there’s room for you to help me here.”
And I don’t mind that at all.